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| Posted by LueEd Smith on March 15, 2004 at 10:40:52: In Reply to: Re: passive controlling people posted by Anonymous on May 08, 2003 at 15:32:13:
> > What is meant by passive controlling? People that are selfish and spoiled are controlling. It is hard knocks that bring out the good in people. Never give you child comforts if you see that they are not willing to work for them in some way or care about the coforts and happiness of other's. My husband is very controlling and he never had to work for what he got. Of course he didn't get love, but he got all his physical needs handed to him. He is very unhappy now and lost. I so want to help him and he says that I have helped him since we are retired and he is noticing how I live and care about other's and get back even more. He is a good soul, but very misdirected from birth. I wish I knew where to go to get some guidaned on how to help him. If I mention it to our kids, they don't think it is right for me to put them in that situation, and perhaps that are right. I don't do it often, but have called them when I have been very discouraged. I know that I am not the reason he is afraid and hiding behind lies, because before we married, he was a friend of my brother's and was timid and a wallflower then. He enjoys being alone and says that he sits and has a pity party. If I ignore him, that is another good thing...another party. I will do whatever it takes, to help this, as I am a strong woman and been through many years of all kinds of hard knocks. I didn't like them at the time, but now I feel that it has helped me and try to use it to help anyone that needs it. Wish I had it, but if I can't get help, I can give what I have learned to support someone else, if the situation arrises. Thanks for listening. Lue
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